Her self-image was modest. When asked, she would describe herself as 'just an ordinary wife, mother and Gran'. And however this basic soul outlived a son, a grandson and a excellent-grandson in her 87 years. And earned the undying devotion of a number of children and their parents - grateful recipients of her brand of enjoy and care. She was the longest serving volunteer at The Women's and Children's Hospital, Adelaide, clocking up an incredible 6,000 hours of service over almost 35 years. And for this amazing devotion to the kids in have to have of comfort and care as they endured their medical procedures, she was awarded the Order of Australia medal at 83 years of age. She was my Mother.
Perhaps her humble beginnings as the middle child of 13 developed her sense of duty, and care and responsibility for others. Much more typically than not, my Mum would locate herself alternating between becoming the youngest of the older group - and helping to mother the younger ones. An enduring trait was her desire to consistently be able to 'paddle my own canoe'.
My Mum and Dad fell in love at initial sight - when she was just 15 and he 17. "It won't last", a number of said. Properly - only until my Dad's premature death at 62 years old - and my Mother in no way remarried despite living on alone for one more 27 years. Their Adore had been both exclusive and exceptional. When her fourth child choked and died in her arms after a long illness (from which he had seemingly recovered) - she almost lost her mind with grief. Only the conception of one more baby could save her sanity - and so I came into being. Ironic that they had decided four youngsters was their limit.
The next test of her faith and 'survival' instincts would be to face the inevitable 'empty nest' syndrome when I married and left residence. Accurate to form, she sensibly began voluntary work at the then Adelaide Children's Hospital just before the nest was vacated - and rapidly became committed to the Spina Bifida youngsters and their lengthy medical wants - spanning years of their lives. She was their beloved unofficial 'Gran' - the lady in pink who cuddled and reassured them when painful procedures, injections, wound treatment, etc. had been necessary. Mopping tears and calming fears was her speciality. In later years, Mum was invited to (and attended) a great number of special celebrations of her 'chosen' kids - such as 21st birthdays, weddings and the like. There had been possibly 6 or 8 young Spina Bifida adults at her funeral - in their wheelchairs - paying tribute to what she had meant to the several lives she touched.
This extremely modest lady received many awards through her latter years, like -
Life membership of the Women's and Children's Hospital, Adelaide,
Lions Club 'Mother of the Year' in her local region,
Rotary Club award for Community Service.
But the greatest, most overwhelming of these was the Order of Australia medal in 1995.
Unforgettable, the vision of her walking down the 'aisle' of the Reception Room of Government House, like a several type of bride, to have this spectacular gold medal pinned to her lapel by the Governor of South Australia of the day, Dame Roma Mitchell. And unimaginable the pride to see her honoured in this way amongst 25 other 'heroes'. How special to have our individual opinion officially recognised, validated and rewarded in this way. It meant so a lot to my Mother, despite her acute embarrassment at 'all the fuss'.
As if everything else about her had not been amazing sufficient - she had only ever performed all this on 1 half of 1 kidney - from birth. Had this been recognized, no youngsters would have been permitted due to the extreme risk factor to her life - and possibly baby's, also. Strange thought, that. Little wonder she suffered constant and severe back discomfort throughout a huge component of each of her pregnancies. The medical belief at that time, was that this was to be expected - as the result of having four pregnancies so close together. Regardless of the odds, she achieved 5 live births, and lived to see 11 grandchildren and 17 good-grandchildren. And managed extensive travels as effectively - such as all States of Australia, New Zealand. a South Pacific cruise, and a trip to the USA just prior to she turned 80.
I wish I could say she died peacefully in her sleep at property - not so. A series of falls changed her 'copabilities' and the last months saw hospitalisation and a move to Residential Care, where her life ended. Time had wearied her, right after all.
Clearly, our two hearts and souls became irrevocably entangled from the day of my conception, and our love forged the initial time she held me in her arms. Strange - and ironic - but somehow SO suitable - that my beloved Mother would eventually take her last breath in my arms.
She was an exceptional lady - my Mother, Win Graham. And am I proud? Most undoubtedly! And am I crying as the memories flood back? Unashamedly - yes!
© 2011 Christine Larsen All Rights Reserved
